The Society of Those Who Tip Accurately To Reflect The Quality Of Memphis Service

Today Bluto is annoyed again. This time it's about lousy customer service and, more specifically, why we continue to support it. At the end of today's entry I have an invitation to you, and to others, to help make a difference and accurately expose places where the service, well, routinely has a high suck factor.

Be honest. When was the last time you went to a restaurant and tipped 20% even though the service was lousy?

Guess what? You just empowered that lazy or apathetic server to do the same thing to the next chump.

My family and I, along with some friends, visited PF Chang's on Sunday. We were seated promptly, which may be notice served that the place is starting to become less popular. I mean, when was the last time you went to one of the more popular Memphis eateries right after Church on Sunday and got a seat right away, especially for a party of nine as we had? I can't remember.

At any rate, we sat in our seats for several minutes before anyone came to take a drink order. At that point I should have known something would be wrong but I was having a good time conversing with our friends and watching our children, and theirs, play drums with their chopsticks (which I confiscated shortly thereafter when plates became cymbals).

Things were looking up again when the server said she'd have no problem remembering how to split the check. (doing this keeps friendships fresh, IMHO)

But after our drink glasses went unfilled each and every time, and we sat for 10-15 minutes waiting on refills, after our sauce mixes didn't come out when the spring rolls did (I LOVE the sauce when it's mixed just right) and after half the food came out and we had to wait for the rest, things just went downhill. My favorite was her making us wait for 15-minutes for our check, and forgetting our take-home box. I got a bit snippy at this point.

I summoned a manager, and my friend and I calmly, believe it or not, explained all that had gone wrong. The manager was helpful and I believe heard and considered our points. BTW, the male manager on duty seemed oblivious to everything. It was his female counterpart that actually seemed as if she had a clue.

The final insult came when the checks came and 18% gratuity was tacked on. The manager offered to reduce it but, by this time, we had been in the restaurant for one hour and 50 minutes, and our children had long since reached the bouncing off of the walls point. We protested, signed the checks and left.

What saves this place is my friend and I agree we usually get good service and good food when we go there, which is often. But we have been twice on recent Sundays and, both times, things simply sucked. And having to wait on one's food, especially when one has kids in tow, for nearly an hour is unforgivable.

Last night we took a friend who had a reason to celebrate a success to dinner at Cozymels. I am not a big fan of the place, but she likes it so my wife and I took her there.

My youngest ordered the kid's "Mac and Cheese" meal. We were informed the place had run out of pasta. Tell me, how does a place run out of enough pasta to make a kid's mac and cheese?

Of course I tipped 20%. I am a moron.

Here's what I propose for all of you who read this and, I hope, you will spread the offer to any and all of those you know who might like to participate.

Let's create, with all of us as charter members, the "The Society of Those Who Tip Accurately To Reflect The Quality Of Memphis Service." We will pledge to each other that, if we get sucky service, we will tip ten percent or less. I am NOT a big fan of "stiffing" a server because, even if they stink at their jobs, they have mouths to feed.

To be a member you have to pledge to tip to accurately reflect the quality of the service AND to speak with a manager BEFORE leaving the establishment that day.

Part two; you will send your restaurant experience narratives, being as specific as possible, to me. Then I will have establish one day per week where I will post them and we will share which local dining establishments to avoid, which ones to patronize, and which ones to simply ridicule and at which to scoff.

If you sign your post, and I know who you are, you will remain anonymous. If I don't know who you are, and you give me a valid email address, which is non-Hotmail or GMail or other anonymous service, or if you tell me who referred you to the blog, I will post it and not use your name.

I think the Commercial Appeal's Restaurant Reviews are no longer useful. It used to be they would excoriate lousy service or food, and give a grade to reflect that. Now there is no grade offered, and they simply love everywhere.

So, this forum can serve as an accurate reading of what customer service is really like at local dining halls, both expensive and cheap.

Get to eating and get to writing. We can help each other to know how and where to spend our eating-out money more effectively and efficiently.

And I'll have you to help me creatively bitch about stuff.